Our first baby was born on June 20 of 2021 on Father’s Day. She weighed 7lbs and measured 19 inches.
The Contractions
It all started on Friday, June 18th. I was at work and I began to feel very mild contractions on my belly. I let my coworkers and supers know and requested time to catch up and wrap up some work.
If I went into labor that weekend, I would begin my maternity leave for 12 weeks immediately.
That night the contractions stayed mild. The next day I spent all day in my bedroom and the contractions increased and became more intense – consistently slow.
I had a hard time moving my body because I was so heavy and I was inactive during pregnancy.
The contractions had moved to my lower back. I felt like I couldn’t get comfortable at all.
My husband tried to comfort me with back massages. However, we were both newbies and not as informed as I wish so we didn’t know what else to try.
We tried to labor as much as possible at home. However, I couldn’t withstand the labor pains.
I took a shower and shortly after we decided to head to the hospital since the contractions were closer together and very intense. I knew I was going to get the epidural at that point because I just needed the relief.
I have had lower back pain since I was 12 years old. It was pretty bad most of my life since then, especially if I stand for long periods. This was 10x worse because there was no relief regardless if I laid down or sat up.
My mom offered to come along too. I accepted since I thought she could be additional support. I let her know that I wasn’t sure if the hospital would allow her to be there as well.
The ride to the hospital was extremely painful and uncomfortable. However, my husband is my personal Batman and a great driver. So, we made it there pretty quickly considering traffic.
At The Hospital
When we arrived I had to answer quite a few questions to register & check in.
I was taken to triage to check how much I was dilated and how the baby was doing.
Shortly after the nurse performed a cervix exam, I felt a consistent stream of liquid coming out. (I believe that she accidentally broke my amniotic sac).
Since it was 2021, they swabbed my nose to complete a covid-19 test.
They hooked us up to the heart monitor for the baby and to get my “vitals”.
They told me that I tested positive for covid-19. (I was shocked because no one I had been around had covid or any symptoms. To this day, I think it was a false positive since none of us got symptoms in the next few weeks either.)
I informed my mom of this diagnosis and explained that the hospital would only allow one person with me. Of course, my husband was staying with me since that’s how it was originally planned. My husband notified my brother to make sure she was taken back home.
After the nurse confirmed that I was at about 6cm, they took me to the delivery room & we waited there for the anesthesiologist.
I was writhing in pain & dreaded the next contraction. My husband was also suffering a little as I squeezed his hand with every contraction! Haha, poor guy.
The nurse heard me tell my husband that all the pain was in my lower back & I couldn’t do this anymore. She called to confirm how much longer we’d have to wait for the anesthesiologist.
Unfortunately, it was a highly busy night so we had to wait a bit longer. (I think the hospital I go to is always busy though).
The Epidural
The anesthesiologist finally came and they had me sit up.
I was told that I needed to stay very still while the anesthesiologist injected the epidural into my spine.
He asked me to tell him if I felt anything.
Once it was administered I felt relief! Whew!
I felt no contractions, no pain. I could finally rest and we both did just that. We took a nap.
The student OB-GYN came in to check on me. She measured and estimated the size of my baby at 8lbs. Then proceeded to explain all the risks if the baby was too big and the possibility of a c-section.
(To be honest, I didn’t pay that any mind. My pregnancy was not high risk and many women have delivered 8lb babies without tearing. So, I was sure that I could at least manage pushing mine out.)
She confirmed I was at 10cm and said we could start with the pushing.
The Pushing
So, my regular OB-GYN was called in and they got me ready. (She was my “regular” OB for about a week. More on this on a later post regarding my experience with prenatal care).
They had me on my back with my legs open & feet lifted – the traditional labor position at hospitals.
I couldn’t feel anything so I pushed at random. I was able to feel when the head was coming out then when it came out but no pain. It just felt like something abnormally big was stuck between my legs.
I pushed again, then our firstborn baby girl was born.
They knew I wanted delayed clamping; however, they only pretended to delay it (cause it was literally for like a couple of seconds). The cord was short so I think that they didn’t want to delay clamping for very long (or at all).
My husband was given the opportunity to cut the cord, which he did. (He doesn’t remember cutting the cord).
The Afterbirth
After they took the baby to the baby station, the doctors waited for the placenta, then they stitched me up (I was informed I had a second-degree tear).
They pressed on my abdomen (aka fundal massage) to stimulate the uterus and cause it to contract. This helps reduce the postpartum bleeding. Then they finished cleaning me up, gave me a new gown and socks, etc.
After they were done measuring baby, they put her on my chest for skin-to-skin. I didn’t feel a connection to her at the time. She felt like a stranger to me and I didn’t know what to do with her.
The nurses helped me attempt breastfeeding but she wouldn’t latch. If she managed to latch she wouldn’t stay latched.
We were taken to our postpartum room where we would remain for the rest of the hospital stay.
The Postpartum
I was transferred to the postpartum room in a wheelchair with the baby in my arms, as the epidural continued to wear off.
My husband took the baby once we arrived.
The postpartum nurse helped me up and took me to the restroom. They needed to make sure that my bladder functioned well, especially after having a catheter inserted due to the epidural.
When I was sitting on the toilet I started to feel a bit lightheaded. Once I was done, I stood up. Next thing I knew I was in an ambulance and there were a few people there talking very loudly.
I heard a voice calling my name at a distance and then I was back in the bathroom. I was sitting on the trash can.
The nurse asked me if I was okay and helped me up. She told me to go slow.
I moved very slowly to the sink and washed my hands. As I reached for the paper towels I started feeling lightheaded and my vision started to black out.
I was back in the ambulance. Everyone in the ambulance was talking very loudly and at the same time. I, then, heard a voice calling my name.
As I transitioned back to the bathroom, I realized that I was on the floor. More nurses had been called in to help get me up. They had me inhale a potent chemical (I don’t remember what it was called). It hurt to inhale it but it helped to get me alert.
I remember apologizing to the nurses for causing so much trouble. They were very nice and thought it was a little funny. The nurses reassured me that it was just fine. They explained that it happens sometimes with moms who receive the epidural.
Once on my bed, I was doing well. They gave me some crackers to munch on.
After settling in, they started my rounds of meds, including pain relief. Yay! And the routine fundal massage. Boo!
The Reflection
Looking back at my birth experience, I noted a few things that I liked and disliked.
First, what my husband and I highly enjoyed was having time together without any visitors. It was like a little getaway from the world.
Second, I realized that getting the epidural provided me with short-term relief (which I definitely needed) but it also caused a longer and more painful recovery.
I am aware that all women are different. I am also sure that me being out of shape, heavy, and having back labor impacted labor and delivery in general.
After leaving the hospital, I felt so weak and tired. My whole bottom was in so much pain and so uncomfortable.
I used different items for relief that helped a little. But, boy, was I extremely relieved when the tear healed superficially!
It was sore internally because muscle takes longer to heal; but goodness, was I doing so much better. It took 2 weeks for the superficial healing to complete, at which point, I would not need to use anything but a pad for the lochia.
This leads me to the next thing I noticed. For this birth, I stopped bleeding/leaking lochia at about a couple of days before my 6th-week postpartum appointment. (The lochia is the discharge that occurs postpartum and lasts for a few weeks).
Spoiler alert: For my second and third postpartum periods, the lochia stopped at about 2 or 3 weeks postpartum. This really surprised me.
Speaking about my bottom, haha…The stool softeners I took religiously were very helpful! I was so scared to poop the first time at the hospital. Due to the second-degree tear, the tear stung every time I used the toilet. I used the peri bottle consistently which helped a lot.
Omg, I showered every single day and often twice within 24 hours! I could not go a day without a shower. It helped me so much to get relief from the discomfort, sting, and pain I felt on my perineum.
I used the peri bottle in the shower, which helped so much. When no one was available to watch the baby, I put the bouncer in the bathroom with the baby and had a bottle ready in case she started crying.
(I also cried quite a lot in the shower or at night – the recovery isn’t as bad as a third or fourth-degree tear but it was torture on top of being new at the mom thing and trying to breastfeed).
The Conclusion
Whether it is a difficult recovery period or an easy one, developing systems like the one I had for my shower times, will get you through and make things less stressful.
If you’re curious to know what I used for my postpartum recovery periods – I will release my list in an upcoming post.
If there is anything you’d like me to elaborate on or if something stood out, reach out or leave a comment.
Thank you for reading thus far. I hope you enjoyed this story! Feel free to binge-read the next two stories!
